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i embrace solitude. it gifts space. space allows time to know intimately, and to heal.

solitude is often confused with loneliness, but they are different. loneliness is a shroud of untruth that can weigh heavy and dark. loneliness tells us we are alone and without. somehow on the outside of things. a wallflower, when everyone else is dancing. we don’t have to be alone to feel it. we can feel loneliness even while enveloped within a crowd.

whereas, with solitude there can be an awareness that we are never truly alone, rather we are a sacred part of this vast wide universe (perhaps multiverse!), surrounded by so much life. and yet it is intimate as well. this very body we inhabit is made of trillions of cells, all also imbued with Life and held together in Love. how can it get any more intimate? life in every cell, each connected to all other things – Life itself, interdependent and interconnected. as Thich Nhat Hanh has said, we “inter-are.” a luminous tapestry of Life formed and held together in Love.

it is unfortunate that we have built a culture of aloneness, of loneliness. one where we are often encouraged to go it alone, every person for themselves. what a lie. how cruel.

so when we feel loneliness, may we simply stop and breathe, and open our awareness to the feeling of our breath, the beating of our heart, trillions of cells working to support Life – their life, our life. and around us, plants, animals, all a part of the same diverse, beautiful tapestry. and then other people, our coworkers, acquaintances, friends, family. we can wish for them that they do not feel loneliness, just as we wish to not feel loneliness.

we will all feel loneliness from time to time, i suspect. we should honor how we feel and hold it with tenderness. but we don’t have to believe or hold onto the lie. we can let go of it. we can reach out in love, to ourselves, to others, even the little ant scurrying by, or the fly on the wall. we are in this together. 

know in your heart that you are not alone.

“Destiny itself is like a wonderful wide tapestry in which every thread is guided by an unspeakably tender hand, placed beside another thread, and held and carried, by a hundred others.” ~ Rainer Maria Rilke

~j

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