though my main practice is sitting meditation, Shamatha (Sanskit for peaceful abiding, “Shyine ” in Tibetan), i am leaning into and benefitting from practicing Metta (Pali for loving-kindness, “Maitri” in Sanskrit) more regularly during this challenging time.
here is a Metta verse i wrote for myself in my practice quite a while back. though i’ve shared it before, i wanted to share it again, since it may be useful to reflect on for others as well.
for many of us life can feel overwhelming right now. there is an urge for some of us to just move on, or to pretend reality is something different than what data, lived experience, and facts tell us.
please rest as needed and then come back to the table.
#COVID19 is real and continues to rise in half the states, even while politicians and businesses push to reopen at the cost of human life. we are still in first wave, second wave in fall, and China has brand new clusters of outbreaks this week. openings should be done responsibly. we should be wearing a mask and social distancing responsibly.
#BlackLivesMatter still needs to be a primary focus. even with the spotlight on law enforcement culture, new videos emerge of racism, abuse of power, and death. the systemic and cultural changes needed take longer than a week or two – a lot longer, in fact – ongoing. we can’t lose this momentum, there’s too much at stake.
all of this, while having a would be dictator President who at every turn undermines the dignity and value of life – in humans, animals, and environment, while glorifying division, aggression, and violence.
we are finding that perhaps more than ever in our lives, that we are indelibly interconnected and our attention is needed. please please pay attention. life needs our attention.
just a reminder as we see examples of those in authority and seats of power choosing aggression and violence as their way…
especially when said power and authority is abused and used to further oppress the already marginalized, rebuff inalienable rights, and maintain the status quo.
we go to where there is suffering, this is the practice.
we go to where the suffering is in our own hearts and minds, and go out into the world to where there is suffering. this is the practice.
we sit with our suffering, to bear witness to our suffering, to know our suffering, to attend to our suffering, to allow our suffering to heal. this is the practice.
we go into the world to where there is suffering to bear witness to the suffering, to attend to the suffering, to change the conditions that have led to the suffering, so that there can be healing. this is the practice.
we must recognize the truth that we are interdependent and interconnected, one body of Life. it is our responsibility to attend to, to help, to love and heal the part of the body that is being harmed and is suffering. it can be uncomfortable, it can be challenging, but it is the work of Love.
this is why we say #BlackLivesMatter.
this is why we say #NoJusticeNoPeace.
this is why we say #SitDownRiseUp.
this is why we call it #EngagedBuddhism for Buddhists. ~j
but it NEEDS to be said over and over again to our families, our friends, our neighbors, our coworkers, our local, state, and federal representation through voice, action, activism, art – small and large.
in Buddhism it is stated that we are interdependent, and Dr. King stated the same thing.
what does this mean? it means i cannot exist without you and all that is around us. everything is a co-arising of Life. this also means that there is no true justice or true peace unless there is justice and peace for every single life. we are not truly free if another life is oppressed. how can we be? we can act like it all we want, but it isn’t true freedom, it isn’t true peace. it also means that there is no end to collective suffering as long as there is still individual suffering.
this is a truth we have to embody down to our every cell, if we want this world to change and all life to be valued as the sacred embodiment of love that it is.
facing our demons is uncomfortable, but necessary.
this is true individually and collectively.
we tend to fall into our habitual patterns of avoidance – anything other than experiencing the discomfort and facing it!
this is true individually and collectively.
on so many levels and in so many ways, our demons as a country, as a world, as a species are awakening to the surface.
scary? yes.
uncomfortable? yes.
necessary? yes.
the only way to heal these ancient wounds, this long suffering, is to face them, to acknowledge them. that’s the starting point, acknowledging. as Fr. Richard Rohr says, “You cannot heal what you do not acknowledge.”
it takes the courage of an open heart. it takes awakening to our interdependence. it takes getting in touch with our empathy. it takes enacting our compassion – sometimes fierce compassion!
all of this, all of the above mentioned, is an act of love.
love is not sentimental. it is a courageous, humble, connecting, in the trenches with dirt beneath the nails, healing force.
at this heavy moment and in what will likely be challenging months ahead, find and lean into a practice that keeps you grounded, your heart open, your mind steady, and reminds you there is beauty and love in this life.
The killing of #GeorgeFloyd has just been sitting with me with no words available until today. It follows so many incidents of Police brutality and killing of men of color in this country. An unarmed human being only suspected of a nonviolent crime suffocating at the knee of someone who has sworn to protect and serve, while other police stand by ignoring the pleas to stop, “I can’t breathe.”
#BlackLivesMatter. We must keep saying it. A dear beautiful friend, posted how this has affected him and I messaged him. What I shared with him best describes how I feel and want to say.
I’m sorry. As much empathy as I can muster, even as a gay man who has felt the wounded side of being targeted a handful of times, in truth I don’t know what it is like to live in this kind of fear. I hate it, racism. I know I want to be a part of the solution, not part of the problem. I desperately worry about my nephews and nieces of color, especially my nephews as they become young men in this country. Two of them have autism. I’m afraid that they’re not going to read social cues from another citizen or a cop and will get shot, because they aren’t given the space, the time, the chance that breathes in the moment between life and death. I know that as a white man, as an ally, I am in a place of privilege and responsibility to be on the frontlines of the solution. I know we have to speak loudly at every turn, phrase, action, joke and embody being antiracist. It’s not enough to not be racist. We must be AntiRacist. We must dig deep into the soil, uproot fear, ignorance, cultural identity/traditions, hate. We need to elect more people of color into positions of leadership and power – especially women of color. I think as this happens, there will be fervent resistance from racists entrenched with fear. Let it be the last gasps of racism, then. I pray for this country. It is due for a reckoning, because we have been unwilling to look racism directly and name it for the evil that it is.
I love this friend, I love my nephews and nieces. George Floyd loved and is loved. There’s no peace without justice. There’s no justice with racism. We must end racism – personal and structural.
The Metta Garden 